Masih ada yang ingat atau tahu film Xena, The Warrior
Princess, yang pernah disiarkan di salah satu stasiun tv swasta sekitar tahun
1990an.
Nah, dulu saya pernah dijuluki Xena oleh teman-teman saya
saking tomboynya saya. Sebelumnya saya juga pernah mendapat julukan cewek
ganteng, cewek macho. Hehe.
Bukan salah bunda mengandung kalau saya terlahir dengan
pembawaan begini. Saya tidak suka memakai rok, rambut selalu pendek, lebih suka
menyandang ransel dan bersepatu kets. Bahkan sewaktu SMA dulu pernah beberapa
kali naik gunung dan hampir saja memilih taekwondo sebagai kegiatan eskul kalau
tidak karena dilarang bokap yang mungkin tidak mau anak perempuan satu-satunya
menjadi semakin macho. Hehe.
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| Keke's collection of hairpin |
Belakangan ini saya agak merubah penampilan dan semuanya
berawal dari hal-hal yang tidak terduga. Yang pertama adalah tiba-tiba saja bosan
dengan gaya rambut. Berubahlah gaya sisirannya. Kemudian ditambahi jepit rambut.
Dan tidak membutuhkan waktu lama bagi dia untuk melihat ada
yang beda dengan kaki saya.
“New shoes?” dia bersiul. Sepatu baru?
“Yeah”
“Looks beautiful on you”. Kelihatan cantik dikaki kamu.
“Do you think so?”. Beneran?
“Is this mean you gonna throw away those sneakers?”. Jadi kamu ga bakal pake lagi tuh sepatu kets
kamu?
“Well, actually, I’m thinking of getting a new one”. Sebetulnya sih lagi mikir buat beli sepatu
kets yang baru.
“Why don’t you wear something nice like these?”. Dia
mengangkat sebelah kaki saya dan meletakkannya diatas lututnya. Kenapa sih kamu ga mulai pake sepatu model
gini aja?
“They are not cheap” saya menahan napas. Ini ga murah.
“How much are they?”. Berapa
harganya?
“Two hundred thousand”. Dua
ratus ribu.
“Dollar?”
“No! I couldn’t afford it if they were in dollar”. Saya spontan tertawa. Ga bakal mampu gue beli kalo harganya dalam
dollar.
“Rupiah?” dia tersenyum lalu merogoh kantong, mengambil
dompetnya.
“I don’t need any reimbursement” kata saya buru-buru. Ga perlu diganti.
“I don’t mind” dia mengulurkan uang 200 ribu. Saya ga keberatan.
“Honey, I bought them with your money” saya tertawa. Saya beli sepatu ini pake duit kamu kok.
“Really?” dia mengerutkan kening. Kelihatan bingung. “when did I give you two
hundred thousand rupiah?”. Kapan saya
kasih ke kamu duit 200 ribu?
Duh, kakek… lupa dia kalau beberapa hari sebelumnya kami
pergi ke toko buku dan dari sekian ratus ribu duit yang dia berikan ke kasir
ternyata kelebihan 200 ribu. Berhubung saat itu telpon selularnya berdering dan
dia sibuk mencatat sesuatu, kasir lalu memberikan uang itu kepada saya.
“Hold them for me” katanya waktu saya mengulurkan uang itu
kepadanya. Tolong pegang dulu.
Jadi uang itu akhirnya terbawa oleh saya. Entah kenapa lupa
saja untuk dikembalikan padahal saya bawa-bawa terus dalam dompet. Sampai
akhirnya saya memakainya untuk membeli sepatu ini.
“Have you already forgot when we went to the bookstore and…”
sudah lupa waktu kita ke toko buku..
“Ah, ya, the change..” dia tertawa “is that two hundred
thousand?”. Oya, duit kembaliannya..
emangnya ada 200 ribu?
“Yes” jawab saya takut-takut. “you are not mad at me?”. Kamu ga marah?
“Why would I get mad to you?” dia terlihat heran. Kenapa saya harus marah ke kamu?
“Because I spent it all for these shoes”. Karena saya ngabisin tu duit buat beli
sepatu ini.
Tawanya spontan meledak mendengar kata-kata saya “don’t be
silly”. Dipeluknya saya. “It’s priceless to make you a woman”. Ga ada harga yang terlalu mahal buat bikin
kamu jadi perempuan.
Semprul!. Hehe.
Saya ikut tertawa. Lega sekaligus kesal. Emang dikata gue
bukan perempuan?. Hehe.
“You know what? Why don’t we go shopping now and find some
dresses, gowns, skirts and handbag that matched with these beautiful shoes?”
dia memberikan tawaran yang saya yakin perempuan manapun tidak akan menolak.
Bayangin aja, ditawarin mau dibelikan baju dan tas sama pacar.
Tapi respon saya adalah…
“No!. You know I don’t like those stuff”. Ga!. Kamu kan tahu saya ga suka sama
benda-benda seperti itu. “I love my backpack and my pants”. Saya lebih suka pake ransel dan celana
panjang.
Dia menatap saya dengan tatapan putus asa dan sambil
menghela napas panjang dia menjatuhkan kepalanya dipundak saya.
“What’s wrong of being a woman?”. Emang kenapa sih ga mau jadi perempuan?
“I am a woman”. Saya
perempuan.
“Then start act like a woman”. Kalau gitu bersikaplah seperti perempuan.
“And all this time I behave like a man?”. Memangnya selama ini saya berkelakuan kayak
lelaki?
“In some ways” matanya berkilat jenaka. Dalam beberapa hal.
Saya ngakak “how ridiculous” dan saya menciumnya “so this is
a man who just gave you a kiss?”. Konyol
betul. Jadi yang baru aja nyium kamu ini adalah seorang lelaki?
“Not when we kiss” dia meraih saya dalam pelukannya dan
mencium saya. Tidak kalau sudah sampai ke
urusan ciuman.
Jadi elu kata gue mahluk hermaphrodite gitu? Berkelamin ganda?
Hehe.
Tapi ternyata ibu Martha pun berkomentar sama.
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| Keke & Mrs. Martha |
Huahahaha…, saya pun tertawa gelak-gelak sampai sakit perut,
apalagi setelah melihat bu Martha memperagakan cara berjalan seorang perempuan
dan teringat pada gaya saya berjalan yang memang benar-benar terlalu ‘gagah’
untuk seorang perempuan. Hehe.
Haduh, tidak pernah terbayang bahwa pada suatu masa dalam
hidup saya, saya harus belajar bagaimana jadi perempuan. Hehe.
Psst, jadi cewek itu ribet.. bet.. bet…
_____________________________
I
think sometime in the 1990-s, there was a tv series of Xena, The Warrior
Princess. Anyone remembers it?.
It
was during those time when my friends called me Xena because I was so very
tomboy. Before that they already called me macho girl and handsome girl.
It
is not the fault of my mother to bear a child that turns so tomboy like me.
Dislike skirt, prefer to wear pants, fond of backpack and knickers. Back in
highschool I even had several experiences of went hiking to the hills and
mountains. I also nearly took taekwondo as my extracurricular activities if it
wasn’t because of my dad who stopped me joined it. He probably worried it would
turn his only daughter become more tomboy. Lol.
I
have been changing my appearance and they were all started unexpectedly. First,
the hair. I changed my hairstyle and start to use my old hairpins.
Next
was the shoe. One afternoon I saw a pair of pretty shoes in Ekalokasari (Elos)
mall. It looked neat on my feet and felt good too on them. though it almost
made my eyes popped out when I saw the price tag. 200 thousand rupiah!. But I
wanted them so much that I bought them. Later I waited nervously for my 'dear' friend's reaction to see me wearing these new shoes along with the guilt
feeling over spending so much money for a pair of shoes.
It
didn't take long for him to notice it.
“New
shoes?” he whistled.
“Yeah”
“Looks
beautiful on you”.
“Do
you think so?”.
“Is
this mean you gonna throw away those sneakers?”.
“Well,
actually, I’m thinking of getting a new one”
“Why
don't you wear something nice like these?”. He took my foot and placed it on
his lap.
“They
are not cheap”I hold my breath.
“How
much are they?”.
“Two
hundred thousand”.
“Dollar?”
“No, of course not" I laughed "I couldn't afford it if they were in dollar”.
“Rupiah?”
he smiled as he took out his wallet.
“I
don't need any reimbursement”I stopped him.
“I
don't mind”he handed me two hundred thousand rupiah.
“Honey,
I bought them with your money”I laughed.
“Really?”he looked confused and surprised at the same time. “when did I give you two
hundred thousand rupiah?”.
Oh,
dear grandpa.. he forgot few days earlier we went to a bookstore and of the
hundreds of thousand rupiah he gave the cashier, two hundred thousand rupiah
were returned to him but because his cellphone rang and he needed to scribble
down something, the cashier gave the money to me.
“Hold
them for me”he said when I wanted to give it to him.
So
I kept it in my wallet and kept forgetting to give it to him until I saw those
shoes and spent all of those two hundred thousand rupiah to buy them.
“Have
you already forgot when we went to the bookstore and…”
“Ah,
ya, the change..”he laughed“is that two hundred thousand?”.
“Yes”I finally got the guts to ask him“you are not mad at me?”.
“Why
would I get mad to you?”he looked puzzled.
“Because
I spent it all for these shoes”.
He
bursted out his laugh “don't be silly”. He hugged me tightly “It's priceless to
make you a woman”.
Whatta?
I
laughed though. Relieved. But tickled too. So you think I am not a female?.
“You
know what? Why don't we go shopping now and find some dresses, gowns, skirts
and handbag that matched with these beautiful shoes?”he gave the offer that I
am certain no woman would say no.
But
my response was…
“No!.
You know I don't like those stuff. I love my backpack and my pants”.
He
stared at me with frustration look on his face before he put his head on my
chest.
“What's
wrong of being a woman?”.
“I
am a woman”.
“Then
start act like a woman”.
“And
all this time I behave like a man?”.
“In
some ways”his eyes teased me.
I
laughed it out loud “how ridiculous”and I kissed him“so this is a man who
just gave you a kiss?”.
“Not
when we kiss”he hold me close and kissed me.
So
am I a hermaphrodite creature? Someone with double genitals? Lol.
But
Mrs. Martha also had the same opinion about my appearance.
“Keke, with that kind of hairstyle, decorated with hairpin and those shoes, forget
the backpack. But if you can't live without it, there are backpack with
feminine design. And don't walk like you're marching to the battle field”
Hahaha…
I laughed so hard that it hurt my stomach, especially to see her showing me the
proper girly walk and reminded of my own walk that definitely is too macho for
a female.
It
never crossed my mind though that one day I would have to learn how to be a
female.
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